HoW To KeEp A HeaLthY LeVel Of iNsAniTy aNd dRiVe OtHeR PeOple iNsAnE.

1) At lunch time, sit in your parked car and point a hairdryer at
passing cars to see if they slow down.

2) Page yourself over the intercom. (Don't disguise yourvoice.)

3) Insist that your e mail address be :

4) Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want
fries with that.

5) Encourage your colleagues to join you in a little synchronized
chair dancing.

6) Put your garbage can on your desk and label it 'IN'.

7) Develop an unnatural fear of staplers.

8) Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has
gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

9) In the memo field of all your checks, write 'for sexualfavors.'

10) Reply to everything someone says with, "That's what you think."

11) Finish all your sentences with either "in bed","In accordance with the 
prophecy", or "On a stick" (But pronounce it as on a steeeek.) if you are 
really ambitious, finish your sentences with all 3. as in 'on a stick, in 
bed, in accordance with the prophecy'.

12) Adjust the tint on your monitor so that the brightness level
lights up the entire work area. Insist to others that you like it that way.

13) dontuseanypunctuationorspaces

15) Ask people what sex they are.

16) Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".

17) Sing Along at the opera.

18) Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

19) Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits.
Wear them one day after your boss does. (This is especially effective if
your boss is the opposite gender.)

20) Send e mail to the rest of the company to tell them where you're
going. For example: If anyone needs me, I'll be in the bathroom.

21) Put mosquito netting around your cubicle.

22) Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party
because you're not in the mood.

23) Talk to your voices when you ride an elevator.